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Friday, August 24, 2018

I'm Ashamed And You Should Be Too

I once was this girl who believed love was like fairytales and everyone deserved it. Even the most unexpected beast was worthy and with the right beauty they would shine as they were always meant too. 

I guess there’s a downside to fairytales though, they are not real. Eventually we all wake up and see reality. Reality is harsh, and cruel and not everyone deserves the best of you. This presents a new challenge. How do you survive in a world without love? 

You can’t, hate only destroys everything in its path, but love, love can bring the deepest of pain to the surface. So what do you do? How do you find your place in this new world? 

News reminds us everyday that what I’m saying is true. Our world is full of terrorist attacks, school shootings, husbands murdering their wives and children, mothers murdering their children. People dying because of their color, or gender preferences, or who they love. 

We are full of a society of people who need to be reminded that they have a child in the car. Phrase like “put something  important in the backseat” tell us that somehow people don’t value their children enough for them to be that one important thing. Animals are abused and images are passed around social media all while doing nothing to stop this from happening. People look the other way and don’t even bother to report it when they see it, they just catch it in action and make it a viral post in social media. 

We have children recording fights like it’s the highlight of their day. Spreading hate among social media just to rip apart someone’s pride, self esteem and emotional stability. They think telling them to die is okay. They are mean and clueless and we just allow it to happen. 

Our world is no longer designed to make a happy home. Families full of divorce, children left alone in the system wishing someone would love them. Politicians and Religions telling us that if we give someone the right to choose abortion than we are only contributing to the harm. All while not giving the right only means more babies get murdered after birth and our system fills even faster with lonely children wishing for love. 

Drug addicts are seeking a high for a happiness they will never find, because it’s not the drug they really need, but to no longer feel the pain they are trying to hide. We don’t help them, instead we just condemn them. They are left believing nobody cares and the world has only contributed to the problem by addicting them to drugs paid for but unaffordable. So they hit the streets and do what they think they have to because they just can’t stand the pain. 

Our patients that are sick and hurting are left with no options because the system doesn’t believe in helping those in need. If pain medication wasn’t so readily available then we could fix the addiction. Now those in pain are viewed as seekers and they get ignored. Left to their own devices to cope with their pain. Wondering if anyone cares about them. 

Churches exclude people based on how they dress, if they have tattoos, who they love, and what their gender preferences are. People no longer feel safe because church shootings are a real thing, and you can’t even just worship God without fear of damnation by those who feel differently than you. It’s not just about those who are not Christian, because the Christians make mistakes too. 

What has our world come to that being a teenager means you contemplate ending your life because bullies can’t be controlled? How is it fair that our children have become so desensitized to love that they think hate is a normal way of life? When did it become okay for our children to be so misguided that they found internet fame meant more than their own life? 

We have a society of people who are offended by everything and agree on nothing. From the way we run this country to the way we spend our free time. You can’t like guns, you should support guns, you can’t like this flag, or that flag. This statue is offensive and that one stands for racism. No matter what side you are on, someone will tell you your wrong. 

Women are supposed to accept that sexual abuse only occurs because they asked for it, dressed inappropriately or acted in a way to suggest they wanted it. Men are supposed to accept that they are men and men don’t get sexually abused, but they do. Men are raised to believe that’s the way you are supposed to treat women, after all they are men and it means no harm, until it does. 

Cops are reluctant to trust civilians and civilians reluctant to trust cops. Because hate crimes towards people by cops are real, because hate crimes towards cops by people are real. Bad cops get by with a slap on the wrist and society is tired of things not changing. People are angry because social media demonizes situation they know nothing about and have no details on. Cops are painted bad, civilians painted bad. How does anyone win? Guns are pointed because fear was instilled. Fear was instilled because guns were pointed. Break the cycle, make the change. There is no trust, and without trust how can any of us truly be expected to behave without fear? 

It’s broken my spirit because I have been on the receiving end of far to much pain. It makes me sad that I no longer believe in love and that everyone deserves it. The truth is everyone is out to help themselves and nobody else. Selfishness and pride has taken over. I lost my spirit and now I don’t know where I belong. It makes me sad, but I don’t know what else to do. You can’t depend on people, and you can’t depend on the leaders of this country. 

If you could, this world would be in a far better state. It’s only gotten where it has because someone dropped the ball a long time ago and nobody has bothered to pick it up. NOBODY! This didn’t happen overnight or even in a few years. This has been in process for many, many years. So don’t go spouting of which Leader is to blame, they all are. 

I have worked hard in life to only get knocked back time and time again. I ran out of steam and can’t keep up the fight. It’s a loosing battle anyway. What I think is that somehow what I had to say, what I felt inside mattered. What is realistic is that it doesn’t matter enough. They claim one person can change the world, but only if given the opportunity. Whose going to given a crumbling girl with nothing but a dream an opportunity? That’s right, nobody is. 

Instead the world would rather kick you when you are down. Because if they keep you down, you will never accomplish anything, and they keep control. They say that we are warriors, but don’t warriors get acknowledged for the battles they face? Instead nobody knows who we are. People don’t listen, and we feel alone. 

Our healthcare system is flawed because for to long people have taken advantage of what was available. Now you have frustrated staff who no longer have empathy, and angry patients no longer receiving quality care. Each blame the other, when it’s truly neither of their faults. 

Our school system is flawed because everyone thinks they have better ideas and things have to change. They implemented new forms of learning and stopped teaching what’s truly important. No more just teaching, it’s fast paced learn or be left behind. Bullies in students and in teachers. No money and no discipline either. 

We have sick with no care, homeless with no help, and hungry without meals. Yet we send money overseas and fund people we call professionals to throw balls and play catch. How will it ever make sense that we pay more money to someone who can memorize lines, or handle a ball, then we do to someone who can memorize how to save your life? We pay our front line healthcare staff less then we pay some retail workers. 

We complain that people want more pay because we don’t value their job. We forget that we can’t all be Doctors and lawyers and famous actors, or athletes. Someone still has to work the little job. It’s not easy to have people yell at you all day that you are not fast enough, or that you messed up their food. You get talked down to, and have to deal with fast paced and busy shifts. Though it might be simple to throw a hamburger together, when someone else messed it up and you get cursed at for it, don’t think they can’t have a stressful job. Stop thinking we have to hold down the little guy, instead provide them with the tools to succeed. 

This world needs love again. This world needs hearts that believe in fairytales and souls that burn with passion. This world needs people to care again. Sounds simple right? Then tell me how we get there? We need responsibility first and compassion second. We need ownership and accountability. From those who matter most, the leaders, the people with the power to make change. If we don’t see it there, how do we ever expect to see it any where?

Maybe this makes no sense to you, but I’m saddened by it all. It’s embarrassing to know this is our country and we let it get this way. I once was a girl with so much passion for everything, now I’m a girl who looks at the world around me and just wants to cry. I used to light up when “I’m Proud To Be An American” came on, now it breaks my heart that people argue about if we should have pray in school and where God does and doesn’t belong. 







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