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Saturday, August 11, 2018

We Need All The Kindness We Can Get

We Need All The Kindness We Can Get

In this day and age nobody really thinks about what they say and how it impacts others. This doesn’t exclude medical professionals. In the AS community often times those in our world have some cruel and hurtful opinions they love to throw at us. If not an opinion, still we here hurtful statements all the time. Often this comes from those who are specifically intended to help us, our Doctors. 

Below I’m going to share quotes from Medical Professionals that those in the AS community have encountered. I hope this helps shed light on why we are so frustrated, feel alone and tend to get short real quick with our friends and loved ones. 

The Words From The Mouths Of An MD

“You must feel like you drag your husband down!”
“If I was you I’d go on disability and screw all my responsibilities.”
“It must suck to be struck down in the prime of your life, perishing before you even get to live.” 
“Well, at least you can look forward to your spine fusing, then you won’t be in pain anymore and won’t need opioids.”

“At least it’s not cancer.”
“I choose not to believe your results are accurate.”
“You are to small to handle your job.”
“You are fine, I know because you are not turning blue.”
“There is nothing wrong with you, none of the medication you take is even for AS.”
“You cant have that, you are female.”
“You can’t have that, you are to young.”
“No, I’m not worried about how you feel.”

“There is no reason to look into that.”
“You do know that women don’t get that (AS) don’t you?”
“Have you been in a bad relationship?”
“It’s all psychological.”
“Fatigue isn’t part of AS.”
“I don’t believe you have the AS.”
“Maybe you picked up the stapler wrong.”
“How do you eat, swallow or do anything?”
“Stop crocheting, it puts more damage in your shoulders, elbows, wrists and hands.”
“I got the pity, unbelieving, or the I don’t care face.”

Words From The Mouths Of Others

“You are just a hypochondriac.”
“You just need to loose weight.”
“You just need to exercise more.”
“You’re just lazy.”
“I wish I could get by with doing nothing all the time.”
“Stop making excuses.”
“You went out yesterday.”
“You don’t look sick.”
“Everyone gets back pain.”
“Stop complaining, other people have it worse off than you.”
“At least it’s not cancer.”
“People only care about a cause that’s important to them.”
“People will ignore me if I share everything about your cause.”
“Somebody else will share it, don’t worry.”
“It could be worse.”
“I get the pity, unbelieving or I don’t care look.”

From The Hearts And Minds Of Warriors 

These things I have shared with you are quotes from those in the AS community. Members of the group Giving Spoons. People who not only suffer from AS but believe in being part of something special. They wish for change, awareness, advocacy, education and support. Many times we feel all alone in this world. Connecting with strangers that we have never met but consider close friends or even family. 

A community of people who are sick and suffering but willing to participate in changing things for others like us. These people will stay up at night to comfort via text and social media others who wait in an ER, or at a Doctor appointment. People from all across the country and even the world. Coming together for a common cause. 2.7 million people suffer from a Spondyloarthritis disease, and by the hundreds and thousands, they come together to be what we want and wish for in our daily lives. 

Take caution to what you say, think before you speak. Be present for your loved one. We get enough frustration from the people are are supposed to help us, our Doctors. No, not all Doctors are like this. More often than not, someone suffering from an invisible illness has encountered at least one of them though. Just do your part to make sure your loved one at least has your support. 

Stay strong warriors and Kick Some AS 

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